SCREEN SOLUTIONS THAT WORK
"IF IT'S TO BE IT'S UP TO ME"
When parents, grandparents, and friends ask me,
“What are some simple solutions for children struggling with negative screen behaviors?”
My first response is always the same:
Every child and every family is unique. The most important first step for me is to listen carefully and, if possible, observe the situation.
But here’s a common scenario:
A 5-year-old has access to screens and video games. When it’s time to turn them off—for meals or bedtime—the child cries, screams, and refuses to let go.
What should we do?
I smile and offer a simple but powerful starting point:
Breathe. Then repeat this mantra:
“If it is to be, it’s up to me.”
This restores confidence and reminds us of a basic truth:
Every situation—good or bad—comes with consequences and opportunities for growth.
Our values—kindness, love, compassion—guide us to take action.
Common sense reminds us that screens and technology cannot solve behavioral challenges.
Step One: Recognize the Problem
Acknowledging there is an issue is the first and most important step toward a solution.
Next, don’t go it alone.
Seek out a trusted resource outside your immediate circle:
a professional
a mentor or coach
a church or community group
Fresh perspective—without judgment—can lead to real solutions.
Needs vs. Wants
This is where clarity matters most.
Ask yourself:
Is this a need—or a want?
Today, those lines are blurred.
Children see adults constantly on screens.
Homes, schools—even airports—are filled with them.
But the truth is simple:
Screens are a WANT.
And like any privilege, they require structure, discipline, and boundaries.
Discipline isn’t easy—but the rewards last a lifetime.
3 Simple Lessons That Change Behavior
These can be adapted to any child or situation:
1. Create Clear Screen Rules
Sit down face-to-face and write:
3 screen rules
3 consequences
Make it a family commitment:
Everyone participates
Everyone agrees
Encourage signatures
Clarity removes confusion.
2. Use Immediate Consequences & Meaningful Rewards
Reward positive behavior consistently
Address negative behavior immediately
Children thrive on clear cause and effect.
3. Replace Screens—Don’t Just Remove Them
Plan real-life alternatives:
Visit a zoo or museum
Swim, hike, dance
Organize playdates or group activities
The goal isn’t just to take screens away—
it’s to replace them with connection, movement, and joy.
Final Thought
Children don’t need more screen time.
They need more face-to-face time.
More structure.
More connection.
Because time spent unplugged—together—
changes lives.